FOODIE

 

This is some local NE chevre with some herbes de provence and peppercorns, a slice of homemade wheatberry bread, a mason jar with Spanish olive oil and the core of a locally grown green pepper.

hi, lunch. 

 

These are some cookies I made for Purim, the Jewish traditional holiday where the Biblical heroine Esther is celebrated with exchanges of good fortune in the form of cookies and other foodstuffs. This sounds like my ideal holiday: the celebration of a righteously diplomatic, kind and principled woman and food (specifically cookies, my kryptonite). 

Yes. 

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Sometimes I pride myself on being a little bit of a foodsnob, and other times I am more humble because I occasionally want a bowl of cheerios at midnight (albeit they are usually the artisan local variety adrift in locally sourced soy milk). And sometimes (usually at the end of the month), I feel a slight sense of remorse at the goodness a new paycheque has brought me in the form of ingredients and fixins. This article helped me gain a little bit of perspective and guidance, although the author's focus was on food associated with hanging out with other 14 year olds and my problem is focused on food associated with afternoon walks in suburbs of Paris, mistakenly delicious alleyways in Brugges, and markets in London. That's not even to mention the cafes in New York or even The Garden. 

(OH! That Garden!!)

Like I said: I'm a snob.

The same basic principle applies in the long run I guess:
Be more humble.

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CONSTANTLY:

Nourish your body: nourish your spirit.

Nourish each other.

Subvert the system that is feeding you garbage.

Fill with love.

(that was to be read as a command)

A Little Bit About

work and life and stuff: (assorted notes). These are things that I want to write so that I will remember them someday when I am old and too tired/busy/scared/forgetful/ashamed/hopeful to remember without aide (possibly very soon).

My job is really cool. Today I spent the morning from 10-2 divided between placing images (paintings and photographs, mostly) and artifacts (old stuff, you know) around in the museum I work at. I took a break at one-ish to get a smoothie. I think my boss likes me. She spends a lot of time every day giving me compliments, which are mostly about my dresses, but almost as often they are about my work and ideas. I feel successful in business. (Mostly I think in terms of True Stories).

I share an office at school (I have one at work as well) with seven other people. They are nice, and I think I am starting to feel comfortable enough to let them know me. We talk about poop and real life things that require trust to discuss. I have a real hard time doing that sometimes... I protect myself too much. Trying to work on that.

I have spontaneously hung out with three new people this week, and have made plans to go out with four other new people in the course of next week. It is not easy for me to be sociable in large groups, so I feel good about these small, one-to-one activities. I get scared when there are a lot of people.

Thursday nights are my favorites. Class and work and social obligations are minimal; potential for relaxation is maximal. These are the nights when I bake bread (every other week), think about babies, and let myself be calm. I think about bread and babies so much probably because I have spent the balance of the week engrossed in discussions and debating marxist- feminist- post-colonial theory. It seems in some way, that I am making them real and giving practical application to theoretical models on Thursday nights. I used to think these thinks were dangerous thinks to think, but anymore, I take comfort in them like old friends. I think we are finally getting comfortable with one another in real ways.

I listen a lot throughout the week. I don't talk as much as I used to.

Tap water here is NOT delicious, unless it is refrigerated for several hours. I try to be sure to have at least one bottle in the fridge every night before I go to sleep, as a gift to myself when I wake up in the morning. I miss mountains and their reserves of things (including, but not limited to water). 

I am learning that I need a lot of validation every day, and am trying to listen to what my body wants more. Today, it wanted water and steel cut outs and hugs. It got all of those things, and so maybe it will tell me more soon. Learning to trust better/more.

I almost always run out of money before the month is out, but this month is different.

I feel very selfish and self-absorbed much of the time. Trying to learn to be more than that.

I bake my own bread

I haven't bought a loaf of bread in years. The last loaf I bought was in ca 2009, I believe. I stopped buying it because that loaf lasted for over a month and never got moldy or stale.  How do people eat non-food?

So my cute cousin gave me a really good bread recipe once when I went to visit her as a respite from Provolandia. It is my go-to recipe, because I can bake it from start (flour and yeast in respective receptacles) to finish (two golden loaves) in under two hours.

I baked some recently.

It tastes like play-doh.

I cannot get enough of it. Am I disgusting?

(This is NOT the recent culprit, but rather an early example from last year, using the same recipe, which inexplicably got HUGE while baking. Bread is an interesting experiment, as the conditions of the day effect the mood and therefore overall personality of the end product.)

(also, I may have a new crush.)